Wow.

I just said goodbye to my friend Colleen and closed the door, standing inside my new apartment.  What a whir of emotion.  My husband and I separated August 1st of last year and have since divorced.  My seven-year-old daughter and I have been living with friends for a year.  I'm apprehensive about all kinds of different aspects of this new step but so ready and excited, too.  I'll keep adding things to my Amazon wish list and taking things one day at a time.  :)  For example, tomorrow I may need to actually fill my fridge with food, but for now, Fiona has a hair appointment in an hour, then she and I will be at work until seven-fifteen or so, and then come back to sleep in our new place for the first time.

Quote of the day

Imagining a future life creates the brain pathways that make it easier for you to actually make the changes you have imagined.

~page 106, Becoming a Life Change Artist by Fred Mandell & Kathleen Jordan 

My friend Tamie sent me a key chain from Ireland earlier this month.  I haven't had one for quite a while.  This instant, there are two keys on it -- one is for my friend Jen's house, where my seven-year-old and I have been living since the 12th of June and the other is to the store I work at -- a new job I started on July 1st.  Very soon, though, the key chain will also hold a key to a brand-new apartment for Fiona and I.  I didn't expect that having a key chain with my own keys on it would be so empowering, but it is -- I have my own keys to my own life - it's makes it easier to imagine the rest of the picture, of having power and security and goodness in my life.  This is a good thing.

Today

Today would have been my tenth wedding anniversary.  Instead, our divorce was final last month.  I don't know that I have more to say about it right now, but I wanted to at least mark it here. 

What word best describes the way you’ve spent the last month of your life?

So Marc and Angel Hack Life had a blog post recently that asked 365 "thought-provoking questions".  I've picked some of the ones that stood out to me and hope to occasionally use them as writing prompts -- join me if you'd like!

 What word best describes the way you’ve spent the last month of your life?

Transitioning.   So much change, this last month, let alone this last year.  Fiona started a new schedule for her time with her dad and I.  I had three more job interviews, met more potential housemates, and looked at more available apartments.  On June 8th our divorce was final and on June 12th Fiona and I moved from Highlands Ranch to Lakewood, to live with our friends, Jen, Kellan, and Josie, for a bit.  June 23rd I saw the doctor and celebrated 2 years of not being hit by a car -- I also started weaning off my pain medication.  And yesterday I started a new job! I really like it and it is something I can be good at.  I'll be looking for a second job to supplement . . . . 

I know that I don't have a clue what this next month will bring or be like, but I know that it will be full of more transitioning and also that all will be well.

What can you do today that you were not capable of a year ago?

So Marc and Angel Hack Life had a blog post recently that asked 365 "thought-provoking questions".  I've picked some of the ones that stood out to me and hope to occasionally use them as writing prompts -- join me if you'd like!

What can you do today that you were not capable of a year ago?

This is kind of a crazy response, but one of the first things that comes to mind is that I can rest in bed, at least for a few minutes at a time, on my right side.   I can't really sleep on it, but just being able to change position in bed for a bit is a nice thing.  Last Thursday I celebrated two years of not being hit by a car and it's nice to remember that I *have* made a lot of progress in those two years.  I'm starting to wean off my medicine and that's tough, pain-wise, but also a good thing. 

What was your last major accomplishment?

So Marc and Angel Hack Life had a blog post recently that asked 365 "thought-provoking questions".  I've picked some of the ones that stood out to me and hope to occasionally use them as writing prompts.

What was your last major accomplishment?

Well, two weeks ago Fiona and I moved from Highlands Ranch, Colorado (where we'd been living with friends) to Lakewood, Colorado (to live, at least for a short time, with other friends) -- Not much more than 17 miles, but a move nonetheless.  It's a good move geographically for us as it puts us much closer Fiona's school and to where we want to be living and working.

I also got a job offer last week, which feels like an accomplishment.  I told them I wasn't ready to make a decision because I had another interview coming up that I wanted to go through with.  That interview was on Thursday and I'm hoping I'll hear back about it by Monday.  It definitely feels like a risk, because I know that the first place may very well interview and hire someone else before I hear back from the second place, but it feels like the right decision in several different ways.  One job is full-time, working at a veterinarian front desk, and one is part-time, working at a natural family living store -- I could bring my daughter with me.  I am attracted to both jobs in different ways.  So we'll see what happens with that.

I've also been meeting with various people looking for housemates this week.  What I'd love to be able to do -- rent a house in  a co-housing community from a woman who is taking a year-long road trip.  I love the co-housing idea and it is in a great location for me and she has two cats that we would take care of.  However, the rent is too much for me to do on my own.  I've spoken with the woman on the phone a few times and may try to meet her soon and see the house -- who knows, maybe something will come together.

I may be getting close to being finished with the insurance settlement from being hit by a car two years ago and I've restarted the process of weaning off my pain medicine. Meanwhile, I'm very much living out of boxes as I'm not sure if I'm moving in two days or two months.  I guess a lot of this is accomplishments-in-progress.  But, really, I am accomplishing major things on a regular basis these days, and that is a good thing.

The Simple Woman's Daybook -- Monday, June 20, 2011

Hosted by Peggy.

FOR TODAY

Outside my window...  a green and wet Colorado morning after a night of rain.

I am thinking... about whether or not I'll be moving again in the near future -- meeting with a potential housemate this evening and feeling nervous about it, for some reason.

I am thankful for... hot water and a body that can move.

From the learning rooms... a bit more solar system knowledge (and some Greek mythology thrown in for good measure -- I never knew the backstory to Paris abducting Helen) due to reading How I Killed Pluto and Why It Had It Coming by Mike Brown

From the kitchen... Cathe Olson's Blue Corn Cracker recipe 

I am wearing... pink and white striped pajama pants and a black waffle weave long sleeve shirt that makes me happy.

I am creating... a cross-stitch butterfly for Fiona.  I'm going to try to work on it some more after her dad picks her up this afternoon.

I am going... to celebrate 2 years of not being hit by a car with a party at Angela's on Thursday night.  Everyone invited!  :)

I am reading... Perelandra by C.S. Lewis


I am hoping... to get a bus pass for July -- just not sure I can cough up the dough.

I am hearing...  cars driving on the wet road outside.  I <3 rain.

Around the house...Josie and Kellan, our two young current housemates, both have birthdays this week.

One of my favorite things... sitting in a coffee shop -- I'm really really enjoying that these days.

A few plans for the rest of the week: doctor's appointment and 2 year anniversary party on Thursday -- as well as a job interview in the afternoon, hopefully, getting to the bank to deposit a check, and diving back into craigslist job postings again.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

Fiona took this picture this morning from the front window of our friends' house, where we moved to a week ago.

Our time at the courthouse

July 16, 2001

Wednesday, June 8th 2011 1:00 p.m. -- my husband and I had our final orders at the courthouse.  We separated on August 3rd, 2010 and filed for divorce on March 4th, 2011.

We waited outside the courtroom until a woman came to tell us we could go in.  She told us that the petitioner (which in this case was me) sits next to the jury.  After she walked away I said to Jeremy, "There's not really a jury, is there?  She's just giving that as a geographic location, right?  I didn't think there was going to be a jury . . . "  :)  And yes, she was giving it as a location --- the jury box, not the jury as a group of people.

When we entered the courtroom, I was surprised at how much it felt like a scene in Perry Mason (I found myself looking for Paul Drake and Della Street.).  Jeremy and I each had our own giant wooden table.  The only other people in the room were a couple of women -- I believe that perhaps one was a paralegal and one was a ... gosh, stenographer doesn't seem right at all ... clearly my mind is still in the Perry Mason era. 

When Judge John W. Madden IV entered, we were told to "All Rise" and after he was seated he asked us to both swear under oath that everything we said in the courtroom that day would be the truth.  Then he reviewed some of the divorce paperwork with us, mostly, it seemed, to be sure we both understood what we'd agreed to -- he focused on the parenting plan and the separation agreement.

Jeremy and I want to work at joint decision-making when it comes to our daughter, and Judge Madden said that he feels that is the best thing for the child whenever the parents can make that happen.  We told him that our parenting time schedule has changed frequently since we separated due to both Fiona's and Jeremy's school schedules.  He said as long as we can continue to be flexible with each other that is a good thing but that he recommends that we put down on paper any schedule that we expect to last for more than a few days and sign it, in order to make things as clear cut as possible.  This is something we should probably do soon, get our summer schedule down on paper (and be thinking about what the fall schedule will look like) as well as check in with Fiona about how she feels with regard to the new schedule (which gives her shorter but more frequent time with each of us).

Toward the end came something I wasn't expecting.  The judge asked us two questions, each in turn, like wedding vows -- "Do you feel that this marriage is irretrievably broken?" and "Do you feel there is any reasonable chance that you will reconcile?"  While I'd already answered these questions (yes and no, respectively) on paper, it was heart-rending to answer them aloud, in the presence of other people.  Just so very sad, that those answers are true and that we never wanted them to be true.  If I'd been even slightly shakier emotionally, I would probably have cried right there in the courtroom.

As the judge began to wrap things up, I asked him if he'd seen the paperwork for Fiona's name change.  He hadn't, so he found them and took a look.  He clarified the spelling (and  lack of a hyphen, and he asked Jeremy if he was okay with the name change (he is).  At which point he said with a grin, "I am 90% certain that this is within my jurisdiction," which I thought was very funny and lightened the mood.  He glanced at one of the women and. when she nodded, he said, "I am being told that that is within my jurisdiction."  :)  I was appreciative of Judge Madden throughout our time with him and felt he made it all go as smoothly as possible.

We left the courthouse with the divorce, Fiona's name change, and my name change all  finalized. 

And so I keep walking forward on this journey.  I still have moments where I'm overcome with grief or anxiety.  I continue to believe that life is short and life is long and when I hold those two ideas in tension it gives me hope that life will come together, that I can make the choice for joy and love and contentment, and that Jeremy and I will find a new way of life where we can be kind to each other and care well for Fiona. 

Last bath at Tim and Amy's

Fiona and I moved in with our friends Amy and Tim (and Mark and Lilly) in October.  On Sunday we moved much farther north -- from Highlands Ranch to Lakewood -- to our friend Jen's (and Josie's and Kellan's) house.  We are blessed with wonderful and supportive friends.  We will miss being with A, T, M, and L, and we will like being with J, J, & K. 

Our last night with Mark and Lilly, the kids had a final bath together.  Fiona and Mark were doing some sort of "cool thing" and Fiona wanted me to take pictures so I headed to the basement to get my camera.  However, when I got back upstairs, Lilly had pooped in the bathtub and bathtime was over.  :) Here are two pictures of what I saw instead:

What I'm looking for job- and housing-wise

I wrote this up to share with my local discussion board and on facebook, and thought perhaps I'd share it here as well -- cause ya'all are very tolerant of my thinking-out-loud posts.  I don't really think I'm moving back to Indiana anytime in the next two years, but at the same time, when opportunities are not arising here, Indiana is in the back of my mind.

Housing--
I am looking for housing for my seven-year-old daughter and myself.  We are used to small spaces and I've been looking at studios as well as one-bedrooms.  We do need a bathtub and laundry facilities (ideally these would not be the same thing:)).   Being close to public transportation is important.  Things we'd love to have, in an ideal world:  hardwood floors, cats allowed (though we do not currently have a pet), wi-fi included, proximity to library/groceries.  I've been looking at places in the $400-550 range and looking wistfully at housing up to $625 if it has lots of other redeeming qualities.   Communal living is also a possibility for us.

Location-wise:
In Denver I'm looking at north of 6th, west of York, and south of the Arvada/Westminster border -- ideally north of Colfax and west of Broadway -- though I suppose it depends where I end up working.

In Indiana I'm largely thinking of Goshen but am open to possibilities in Warsaw and Fort Wayne as well.  In Goshen:  close to downtown and/or Assembly.

Job --

My background is in education -- I have a B.A. in Early Childhood and Elementary Education with a minor in TESOL.  I'm open to working in education but very interested in exploring many other fields as well.  I've recently worked for a public library and for The Container Store.  Since being hit byu a car, I don't think that a job that involves large amounts of lifting would be a good match right now.  Ideally, at least for this first year or two, I'd like to have a job that is finished when I leave for the day.  I'm quite willing to cobble together two different part-time jobs to make my life work well, especially if they seem like a good fit.  And I'd love to work for a local business. 

Some possibilities I've been mulling over:

• working with animals
• data entry
• working with older adults
• working with books/reading
• customer service
• food service
• education
• office work in general
• something with the Spanish language
• childcare with the right family

So this is just a little of what I've been thinking.  Feel free to ask me more questions and share your ideas.

Happy 7th Birthday, My Dear Fiona

At almost exactly this time seven years ago, my daughter was born in our little second floor apartment in Indiana.  She is a lovely human being -- generous, quirky, and quick-witted.

A lot has happened in these first seven years of her life.  She's spent most of them here in Colorado, what still feels in many ways like a "new" state to her dad and I but feels like home to her. She's made friendships here that are an important part of her life.  She's stopped wearing diapers, stopped nursing, started reading, cut her own hair, lost her first two teeth, and started going to a school she adores.  Not necessarily in that order, mind you.  :)

Her dad and I are in the process of divorcing and we are sad that this means a lot of hard stuff for Fio.  At the same time, I want to believe that life has lots of goodness out there for us and that we are walking towards that goodness and peace, even if it's hard to know at this instant what that will look like, for any of us.



I'm so happy she is my daughter and I cherish the time I have with her.  I want today to be a celebration of her, for her to feel loved and surrounded by goodness.  That's all any of us can ask for in this life, isn't it?

Fiona Coleen, you are an amazing person and I'm so glad I got you for my daughter.  I'm sorry things are so crazy complicated right now and I know we will keep figuring it all out.  Happy birthday my lovely seven-year-old.  Happy birthday.

Quote of the day

There was, in Josse's experience, nothing more guaranteed to lower the spirits than uncertainty about the future.

~p.82, Fortune Like the Moon by Alys Clare

Quote of the Day

We cannot become the person we long to be by ignoring the persons we have been.

~Richard Hirsch, Mazhor LeYamim Nora'im:  Prayerbook for the Days of Awe

Happy Thanksgiving 2010

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I'm not even sure how to start this blog post.  I'm in a really, really low place in my life.  I feel alone, I feel aching sadness, I feel deep grief, and I feel raging anger.  I feel abandoned and unwanted, I can't imagine how to make this new life work and I'm scared to death of the future.

At the same time, I feel so supported, so cared for, so lucky, and so blessed.  I can't begin to make a complete list of the people and things I'm thankful for.  People who have known me for years, new friends, and a few I've not even met, from very close by, from across the country, and in a few other countries, are the only reason I'm still keeping my head above water.  I know I keep saying that but it just really is the essence of my life right now.  I'm so sad and I'm so scared, but if I try just a little I remember that there are some people out there who love me and think I have some redeeming qualities.

I know I'm gonna need to figure out how to make it and I know there is a lot for me learn.  I know there are going to be some more amazingly hard things thrown at me.  But sometimes I think that maybe some good things will come as well -- it's just harder to imagine what those things are. As I said a few months ago, I'm pretty sure that the tears of the recent past have brought me a few more lines on my face, but I'm trying to have faith that the world has more laugh lines in store for me as well.  I'm thankful for hope.

I'm thankful for running water and the cat who is currently between me and the back of my chair.
I'm thankful for friends who open their hearts & homes to me.
I'm thankful for my daughter who is healthy, kind, and strong.
I'm thankful for phone calls, e-mails, letters, and care packages.
I'm thankful for those who give me the benefit of the doubt.
I'm thankful that life is both so short and so long and I hope I can remember both of those aspects.
I'm just so thankful, so gol-durned thankful for love.

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I'm thankful for people who believe there is goodness out there for me and tell me so -- and for those who believe there is goodness in me and tell me so.
I'm thankful for people who get that I know it could all be so much worse -- and yet get that it still all sort of sucks at this moment in time.
I'm thankful for really cozy blankets and deep bathtubs.
I 'm thankful for hand-me-down jeans that feel good on my body and for crafty projects to work on and for the crafty friends who help me learn new skills.
I'm thankful for pretty peaceful snow falling from the sky.
I'm thankful for sleep and for chapstick.
I'm thankful for lotion and safe neighborhoods.
I'm thankful for bills that are slowly being paid off and customer service people who are kind to me on the phone.
I'm thankful for people who are kind to my daughter and who are walking alongside her in this time of change.
I'm thankful for clean mirrors and fun socks.
I'm thankful for you if you are reading this and feeling compassionate.
I'm thankful for ridiculous songs I can sing along to and I'm thankful for new possibilities, even if I can't envision them right now.
I'm thankful for my grandparents and the presence they were in my life. 
I'm thankful that I'm here today, able to live and love and try and fail and try again and be thankful.

Teaser Tuesdays -- November 9, 2010 --Careers for Bookworms

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

• Grab your current read
• Open to a random page
• Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
• BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
• Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR lists if they like your teasers! 

Michael believes that one of the reasons you go to college is to find out what you're not good at.  He discovered that he was not good at novel writing, which had been his career goal.

~ McGraw-Hill's Careers for Bookworms and Other Literary Types (4th edition) by Marjorie Eberts & Margaret Gisler

I find this quote really thought-provoking.  I went to a liberal arts college for five years.  I had difficulty choosing a major.  I thought a lot about social work but eventually chose elementary education, later adding early childhood education as a second major and TESOL (Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages) as a minor.  I feel as though I majored in something I was fairly good at, but, perhaps, not the exact right choice -- though I'm also willing to consider the possibility that it was just right for me at the time.  So much else is changing in my life right now that job and career stuff seem very up-for-grabs as well.

Other majors that appeal to me (though I don't have any concrete plans to go back to school):

• Linguistics 
• English (which is key to many careers discussed in this book)
• Spanish
• History
• Literature
• Behavioral Economics

Some of the career options discussed in this book make me drool, to be quite frank. 

• Editorial Assistant -- while I think that being an editor or executive editor would possibly be too high-pressure for me and would certainly require more experience/education than I have at this point, I think I could thrive as an editorial assistant.
• Assistant Editor/Copyeditor/Proofreader -- I already do this internally when I'm reading -- so why not put it down on paper?
• Indexer -- this is the second time in the past few months that I've heard about this specific job (something I'd never thought about before -- "Oh, right -- somebody must do the index...")  From the little I've learned, it seems like indexing might be a skill that is somewhat easier to acquire at this stage of my life and I think it's something I could enjoy -- also something you can do as a freelancer. The idea of having a job that I could continue even were I to change geographic locations seems handy.  You can take correspondence classes to be trained as an indexer.  Of course, spending the entire day at a computer terminal might be physically taxing.
• Assistant at a literary agency -- ". . . could include reading manuscripts and writing reviews; typing and filing correspondence to authors and publishers; and scheduling meetings among authors, agents, and publishers" (49).
• Book club selector -- select books to be offered in Book-of-the-Month Club, Quality Paperback Book Club, etc.  I would enjoy reading and evaluating books that I think others would enjoy.
• Editorial Assistant (Magazine Staff) -- Oooh, what if I could work at The Sun?
• Letters Department Manager (Magazine Staff)
• Consumer Relations
• Obviously, I'd also be happy working in a library (again), a bookstore, or to be involved in literacy in some way.

This book is full of all sorts of career options in addition to the ones I've listed here as well as concrete advice as to what steps to take to find a book-related job you'll love.

Quote of the Day -- Creativity lives in the unknown

Transition and change bring us into the unknown -- where creativity lives -- and from this unknown, we can create in our lives that which did not exist before.  We can initiate and respond to life-changing events or internal uneasiness with creativity and resourcefulness and create a life of meaning and purpose.  So instead of fighting the currents in our river, instead of longing for the stability of the shore, we can flow with the river, finding our own unique way to make the journey.

~page 6, Becoming a Life Change Artist: Seven Creative Skills to Reinvent Yourself at Any Stage of Life by Fred Mandell, Ph.D. & Kathleen Jordan, Ph.D.

More from Becoming a Life Change Artist

p.  40
We may overestimate the magnitude of risk we might take in changing our live, and underestimate our personal ability to successfully navigate such a change. Many of us also mistakenly believe that we  must fully understand and be happy with the potential financial consequences of a life change.  And that belief also causes us to assume that we need to know in advance our exact life circumstances if we are make a change.  None of these constraining assumptions is true.

p. 51
Choose what you pay attention to; do not let others choose for you.

What matters to you most in life?

I just barely started reading Becoming a Life Change Artist: Seven Creative Skills to Reinvent Yourself at Any Stage of Life by Fred Mandell, Ph.D. & Kathleen Jordan, Ph.D.

The foreword is written by Richard J. Leider, the founder and chairman of the Inventure Group.  He speaks of asking people "What matters most to you in life?" and how often they don't really have a ready answer/haven't thought about it in a long time.

His question made me stop and think.  I'm not sure I have anything momentous or unique to say or even fully formed ideas.  But I just wrote down some of my first thoughts in my journal and will share them here.

• being kind and supportive to others
• a belief that, above all else, relationships are what we leave behind on this planet & that making a difference can happen in big or small ways
• being a good listener
• modeling good lifestyle choices to/for my daughter
• being interdependent (rather than dependent or independent)
• taking the time to both work and play
• learning to be more gentle
• laughter
• tears
• joy
• hope
• being welcoming
• living in community and contributing to that community
• creating traditions and making memories
• learning and growing and loving

Friday 56: The Summer of the Great-Grandmother

From Storytime with Tonja and Friends

Rules:

* Grab the book nearest you. Right now.
* Turn to page 56.
* Find the fifth sentence.
* Post that sentence (plus one or two others if you like) along with these instructions on your blog or (if you do not have your own blog) in the comments section of this blog.
*Post a link along with your post back to this blog.
* Don't dig for your favorite book, the coolest, the most intellectual. Use the CLOSEST.

It was not just a bad headache; it was a cerebral hemorrhage, and Liz was dead before morning.  Liz died on the twenty-sixth of November.  The funeral was on the twenty-ninth:  my birthday. 

~The Summer of the Great-Grandmother by Madeleine L'Engle

Cover of The Summer of the Great-Grandmother

I had this book sitting by the computer waiting to be reviewed -- with lots of little strips of paper sticking out where I found phrases or paragraphs I especially liked.  It's a work of non-fiction about the summer L'Engle's mother died.

My world is not the world of L'Engle's family -- children eating dinner separately, trips to the Continent, summer houses, hanging out with the Empress of France or General Custer, owning a house with a marble privy designed by Thomas Jefferson -- but nonetheless I can identify with some of her thoughts and experiences. 

L'Engle came to my college when I was a student there.  I attended her lecture, but remember very little -- mostly an image of a scarf -- so I guess it was winter -- but I don't know if it was her scarf, mine, or my friend Steve's.  I've read more of her writing in my last 15 years than I did in my first 20 and wish I had the opportunity to hear that lecture all over again -- I think it would mean something different to me now.

Some more snippets I wanted to share...

I realize, with a pang, how privileged we are to be able to keep my mother with us.  This is how it should be, but what would I do if we lived in a tiny home and did not have the girls and Clara to help?   . . .  And even though we have room, and the girls to help us, there are still those who think that my mother should be put away.  Put away.  Everything in me revolts at the idea.  But my belief that we are supposed to share all of life with each other, dying and decay as well as feasting and fun, is being put to the test. (p 28)

. . . I do not think that a house can be a happy house if no one has cried in it, if no one has died in it.  If this seems contradictory, I can't help it.  I rebel against death, yet I know that it is how I respond to death's inevitability that is going to make me less or more fully alive. (p 23-9)

I'm much more use to family and friends when I'm not physically and spiritually depleted than when I spend my energies as though they were unlimited.  They are not. (p 46-7)

The mother of my childhood and adolescence and very young womanhood existed for me solely as mother, and I suppose it is inescapable that for a long time we know our parents only as parents, that their separate identity as full persons in their own right unfolds only gradually, if at all. (p 88)

If I have to conform to provable literalism I not only rebel, I propose immediate revolution.  How do I make more than a fumbling attempt to explain that faith is not legislated, that it is not a small box which works twenty-four hours a day?  If I "believe"for two minutes once every month or so, I'm doing well. (p 142)

I prayed very badly in church yesterday.  I often pray badly when I try to say my prayers at home.  But if I stop going to church, no matter how mad church makes me, if I stop praying at home, no matter how futile it sometimes seems, then "real" prayer is never going to come.  (p 144)

 

Deep Breaths -- Take Two

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I've been going through some major changes and transitions in my life right now, giant, scary, hard, sad changes and transitions.  Overwhelming, exhausting, sob-inducing, confusing, tricky, all-encompassing changes and transitions.  Overdue and potentially life- and light-bringing changes and transitions.

Image via Wikipedia

I've been staying on the lighter side here on the blog -- perhaps just as a space where I can keep pretending everything is normal/status quo/okay.

Image by woodleywonderworks via Flickr

I'm pretty sure that at some point I'll start sharing more on here -- perhaps after I figure out the balance between this being my space to process and share and this being a public space that anyone can read.  Between being fair to everyone involved and being good to myself, giving myself some space to think aloud and find encouragement.

Image by LensCat via Flickr

Love and peace to you all on this Monday morning.

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