Today is a full day. When I finish this post, I will take a shower, find breakfast, and brush my teeth. Then my husband will come and pick me up and we will head to our third divorce mediation settlement.
I want it to go well. I want both of us to leave the session feeling like we've covered lots of ground, made progress, have a plan. It's so hard to figure out what is important, where to put one's focus, how to think about the future.
I remind myself that the rest of my life won't be this way -- and try to remember that, indeed, I am in charge of what the rest of my life looks like.
I want to have a good relationship with Jeremy, want Fiona to be able to see us interacting cordially and pleasantly. I keep running up against the fact that: a)it's not super clear what steps/actions/behaviors/words to choose now to help that to be a possibility in 2 years and b) I can't control whether that happens or not, regardless of what steps/actions/behaviors/words I am choosing in this moment.
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